I Am a Big Antisocial Weirdo Around Other Parents

Audrey-Window

An at-home parent typically has one choice every day:  leave the house or stay at home?  Staying is nice because you can go without pants all day and watch The Price is Right.  Going out is nice as well because, you know, nature.  But while going out often involves diaper bags, strollers, and frantic store aisle chases, those unpleasantries aren’t the worst things about leaving the house.

It’s the fact I’ll have to speak with other parents.

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Five Important Rules for At-Home Dads When Mom is Home

Pirate-Audrey

Thanks to the recent arrival of my newborn son, my wife is currently at home on Maternity Leave.  Being a stay-at-home father myself, this is great in many ways.  I’m not as lonely, I have some help around the house, and I can spend some quality time with her.

But this doesn’t mean that everything’s going to be beautiful sunshine and sugary sweet lollipops.  No, a stay-at-home father can make some big mistakes when he’s no longer the sole voice of authority in the home.  I should know.  I’ve made them.  But lucky for you, friend, I’m here to share my vast knowledge, and keep you out of the proverbial doghouse.

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The Many Horrible Things That Will Happen to You When You Go From One to Two Children

Zachary Sleeping

Two weeks.  Two weeks since my family went from three to four.  Two weeks since my 2-year-old daughter met my newborn son.

A lot has happened in those two weeks.  Some ups.  Lots of downs.  My wife and I always knew the transition from three to four would be tumultuous, but predicting our new life and living it are two different things.

Still, knowing what to anticipate when you have a second child is your best course of action should you find yourself expecting once again.  So with that in mind, here is what you can expect to have happen to you upon greeting your second child:

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Art for Zachary

Balloon-Lad-Final-Web

So after many late nights spent sweating over a hot computer, here it is:  my first “drawing” for my newborn son.  Like with my art for Audrey, I kept up the timeless theme of exploration!  And, as you can see, it’s full of hot air.  Just like me.

Hope you like it!

Night of the Possum, Part One

Possum-Door

This story has little relevance to children or parenting.  What it is about, is a possum.  And it’s just too terrifying not to share.

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Dealing With the Almighty Power of “No”

Audrey-Pensive

This morning I went to the playground, placed my 2-year-old daughter on the swing per her request, and pushed it.  Pretty run of the mill stuff!  But this time she immediately became upset.  So I stopped it for her.  But to my surprise this didn’t diffuse matters.  Instead it resulted in just more kicking and screaming.

ME:  “Do you want to swing?”

AUDREY:  “NO!”

ME:  “Do you want to get down?”

AUDREY:  “NO!”

ME:  “So…do you want to just sit there?”

AUDREY:  “NO!”

ME:  (pause)  “How about the slides?  Do you want to go on the slides?”

AUDREY:  “NO!”

ME:  “Do you want to ride your bike some more?  You did so well earlier.”

AUDREY:  “NO!”

ME:  (another pause)  “The spray park is over there.  We could go get your swimsuit and go to the spray park.”

AUDREY:  “NO!”

ME:  “Do you just want to go home, honey?”

AUDREY:  “NO!”

ME:  (running out of options)  “Sesame Street is on…”

AUDREY:  “NO!”

Sigh.  Seeing the neighboring swing, I sat down on it.  Silently.  The silence lasted for seven minutes, each of us sitting in our swings.  Such is life with a 2-year-old.

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